Last night, WBNG along with all other CBS stations aired the Christmas cartoon Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. And as we do every year, Chris and I sat down and watched it together. We watch it because we were both fans of it when we were kids, and it reminds us of simpler times.

For a lot of people, it doesn't feel like Christmas until they see Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer as well as some of the other cartoon classics. Chris and I have seen this so many times that we could just about recite word for word what characters are going to say before they say it. Last night while watching it, I was driving Chris crazy asking questions about some of the things I was noticing during the show. It got to the point where she started doing the same thing.

In no particular order here are some of the things and I have a problem with. When Yukon Cornelius, Hermey, the elf that wanted to be the dentist, and Rudolph first met, the Abominable Snow Monster came after them. Why didn't Yukon Cornelius just pull the gun out of his waistband and shoot him? Have you ever noticed that he's got a gun inside his belt? That would have been easier than jumping on ice and chipping it away to turn it into a floating iceberg.

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What is wrong with the girl doll on the Island of Misfit Toys? They never say what it is that makes her a misfit. She seems like a fine doll to me. She can walk, talk, sing, and even cry. And speaking of the Island of Misfit Toys, when Rudolph and Santa load up the sleigh and leave, why didn't anybody tell King Moonracer that they were leaving? I can picture him waking up on Christmas morning, looking out and wondering where everybody went. Why didn't they ask him to go with them? It's just common courtesy, I think.

And did you ever notice as Santa's sleigh is flying through the air, it's Rudolph and 6 reindeer. The song says there's eight reindeer besides Rudolph. Where were the other two? Who were the two that were missing? These questions need answers damn it. After all these years, I need closure.

Another thing I've been wondering about for years, at the very end of the show when the elf is pushing the misfit toys off of Santa's sleigh, he hands each one an umbrella except for the bird. What's up with that? The bird made it absolutely clear on the Island of Misfit Toys, that he can't fly, he swims. So what happened to him? Did he magically become able to fly, or did he fall to his death from many miles up in the sky?

The last thing I have to say about this is more of a statement that I've been making for years. Santa was so mean to Rudolph about his nose, that I think when Santa asked him to guide his sleigh, Rudolph should have told him to go pound sand, and told him he was going to work for his competition, the Easter Bunny.

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