Emerald Catron has written for Asylum, Lemondrop, MyDaily and Daily Fill. She is one half of rap duo Dem Shortybooz and is a comedic performer around NYC. Follow her on Twitter @emeraldcatron
Emerald Catron
2012’s Dumbest Criminals Are Painfully Dumb
It turns out to make it onto a list of the dumbest criminals, you have to actually be pretty dumb. Granted, we can't all be masterminds, but it probably doesn't take much to know you shouldn't make a YouTube video boasting about the bank you just robbed. Or tweet about punching a guy in the face. Nor should you get into a fist fight over a piece of birthday cake.
We Wish These Hilarious Bane Outtakes Were Real
Granted, this is just a parody, but, oh, that it were real. 'The Dark Knight Rises' would have been a much more entertaining movie if Bane had half the dialogue from this funny parody video. Or if Batman really loved cheesy '90s techno. In fact, we might never watch 'The Dark Knight Rises' again, just so that we can always remember it this way...
Give the Gift of ‘The Walking Dead’ Zombie Babe Calendar
The end of the year must be approaching, because the 2013 calendars are here. Oh well, at least this one has attractive ladies in swimsuits. Covered in scabs. With zombie eyes. Well, they're wearing swimsuits at any rate.
Soldiers in Afghanistan Remake Dolphins Cheerleader ‘Call Me Maybe’ Video
http://youtu.be/H96-TwrwY7M
That's right -- we're still posting 'Call Me Maybe' videos. Deal with it! This one's got soldiers serving in Afghanistan, so it's sort of our civic responsibility to share it with the world.
Man Foolishly Tries to Ride Water Cannon
We're not really sure why anybody would try to sit on a pipe gushing water unless they just really wished they had a chair. This guy is clearly in need of a chair.
See How New Yorkers Are Commuting Post-Hurricane Sandy
Hey, thanks Sandy! As if people didn't hate taking the bus enough, now we get to wait in a line to wait in line to ride one. That's right -- the lines have lines. It's taking people multiple hours to get to and from work. Good thing it's not miserable outside. Just kidding, it totally is! Here are some pics of what people are doing just to get to work.
The 10 Best Skeleton Dances Ever
Videos of old-timey skeleton dances are the best way to get a little spook-ified before Halloween without accidentally soiling yourself. That is a fact -- you can ask anybody. Oh, thanks for asking. Yes, that is a fact. From PBS to Disney and beyond, here are the best skeleton dances EVER to get you into the spirit of Halloween.
Hurricane Sandy Photos – The Amazing Moments You Have to See
As predicted, Hurricane Sandy created one crazy night. Millions without power, explosions, flooding and at least 18 people dead. Don't let your braggedy friends on Facebook convince you this wasn't a big deal. It was crazy. Here are some pics to sum up what happened. Feel free to share your photos in the comments.
7 Photos That Are NOT Hurricane Sandy
Don't always believe everything Facebook tells you. If it was all true, do you have any idea how many dollars would've been donated to charity for liking that picture of a kitten? It can't be all true, and it's not. Here are some pictures of "Hurricane Sandy" circulating around that most certainly are NOT pictures of Hurricane Sandy. You're welcome.
Zombie Pranks Fast Food Drive-Thrus
In the spirit of Halloween, here is a video of a man in zombie make-up driving through various fast-food restaurant drive-thrus and demanding chicken nuggets.